Category: Uncategorized

How did we end up here? Water of the week is Ginger Manzana from De La Calle Tepache and Tropical Fruit from Ocean Bomb.

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What can we say about Amanda that hasn’t already been said in all those five-star yelp reviews? Amanda is great and I love her. She manages the hotel and I manage the restaurant. It’s a party! Water of the week is Ambo Sparkling Water, Aromatic Tonic Water from Fever-Tree, and Egekilde med brus og smag av hindbær og et strejf af rabarber. Now… I know what you’re thinking… what in the heck does strejf mean? Couldn’t tell you.

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Water of the week is three flavors from OCEAN BOMB: Yoghurt, Apple and White Grape.

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Thanks for checking on me. Water of the week is Mango from three different viewpoints: Manga-Habanero from Agua Bonita, Mango from One Piece Ocean Bomb, and Mango from HOPWTR.

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Other good book titles include “I am sorry you feel that way” and “I give my marriage a year.” I would like to formally apologize for the tardiness of this episode: I had to ask the computer for another 1000 pictures. Water of the week is Convicted Melon from Liquid Death.

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This week, I went to a show and saw Haley Heynderickx and she told the audience that she has recorded a new album. But! She’s on a very small record label so the album won’t come out for another 3 years. Somehow, that made me feel better. When it comes to “putting things out”, everyone suffers. Even Haley Hendurizckszx. Even the stars themselves. Water of the week is Hibiscus Raspberry from Good&Gather.

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Next week, we will be back with regular programming. Also, do I think I’m cool when I say “check this out”? Ugh. Terrible. Water of the week is “The Green Tea One” from HOPLARK. Wow.

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Water of the week is “berry citrus” from Daytrip. “Probiotics are foods or supplements that contain live microorganisms intended to maintain or improve the “good” bacteria (normal microflora) in the body. Prebiotics are foods (typically high-fiber foods) that act as food for human microflora.” So probiotics are microbots themselves and prebiotics are food for the microbots?

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This is a non-episode, but we’ll be back to regular programming before you know it. Water is Blood Orange from HOPWTR.

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I’m not enjoying my own energy in this episode. It’s all slightly too frenzied and unhealthy. Are we on the brink of complete collapse? Can we know about such a thing before it happens? Can you see it coming? Well, at least we’re staying hydrated: Orange-Mango-Chili-Lime from Culture Pop Soda, Elderflower Grapefruit from Aura Bora, and Peach Tea from Humm.

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In this episode, we talk about the raw meatball on the floor and how everything flows from this moment. Water of the week is Lemon Elderflower from Trader Joe’s, Strawberry Vanilla from Health-ade POP, and Mint Cucumber CBD Sparkling Water from APRCH.

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I have no idea how to gracefully accept a gift. Water of the week is (1) Peach Marigold Basil from Petal, and (2) Pomelo Sage and (3) Yuzu Orange Blossom from Lolo Sparkling Hop water. Thanks for the water, Maddie.

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This episode was so shameful that I forgot to review the three waters in the ice bucket: “For as long as we’ve had butt cheeks, we’ve been able to imagine what it would feel like to poop our pants.”

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In the library of rare colors, they have a brown color called “mummy.” This pigment was made by grinding up Egyptian mummies and turning them into paint. Water of the week is naturally and artificially flavored strawberry Faygo Redpop!

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Water of the week is Sparkling Clam. Yup, you read that right – sparkling clam! It may sound unusual, but it’s a beverage that has been gaining popularity in some parts of the world, and Joakim is here to give us his expert opinion on it. Okay, so what now? You think this episode description was also written by ChatGPT? You think it’s Artificial Intelligence all the way down? Reaching the lower reaches of the nothingness of the nothing? You think we’ve completely lost everything already? Anyway. Let’s talk about the big question: What’s wrong the the New York Times? Let’s see what the people have to say…
“basically that it’s all about how you can’t just appreciate that something happened but rather it’s only meaningful if it’s this social media style experience narrated by the reporter”
“the other thing is about just being really wordy and vague and using a ton of words when the thing could be just very simply stated, perhaps because this wordy approach is considered colloquial and attractive but also because it helps them to deliver an angle, a sort of ironic point of view”
“and they use verbs with no clear subject”
“or passive voice in a suspicious way”

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We’re on the road again. Water is Berry Cream Probiotic Soda from Humm, Watermelon CBD Sparkling Water from Aprch, and Watermelon, Lime & Rosemary Probiotic Soda from Culture Pop Soda.

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Why is Joakim always so condescending when he tries to explain how to make a cup of coffee? Water of the week is Mango-flavored HOPWTR and Confidence Mood-Boosting Refreshments in two flavors (Mango-Peach and Lemon-Lime).

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We can’t be good at everything, people. Water of the week is not water: Coca Cola with Coffee (dark blend), Coca Cola with Coffee (vanilla), Nitro Pepsi Draft Cola.

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This one’s on me. Water of the week is a tribute to Bill Hader and HBO’s ‘Barry,’ Blackberry Raspberry from Gold Emblem, Passionfruit Blueberry from Polar Seltzer, and Raspberry Rose from Voss.

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I don’t have anything to say about this episode. Water of the week is Yuzu with Ginger from Sanzo, Yuzu Mandarin from Good&Gather, and Pineapple from Lei Back.

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With episodes like these, a lot of listeners always message me afterwards and ask if I’m okay, if I need someone to talk to, if they need to worry about me. And then I’m always incapable of connecting with real people in a real way, so I say something dismissive, like, “What are you talking about? The podcast is just fiction! You think I’m ACTUALLY sad?” The theme for this week is ‘shitty grocery store water’ so we’re doing Lemon from Crystal Geyser and Strawberry Lemonade from Market Pantry. There was a third water, but I was -LITERALLY- too distraught to even remember.

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This week, Joakim tries to live in the moment. At least the water is sparkling: De La Calle! Tepache Cactus Prickly Pear, Sway Passionfruit, and S.Pellegrino Essenza Blood Orange Black Raspberry.

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Ellsworth Kelly is 92 years old and in an interview he said, apropos nothing, “I’d like to live for another 15 years.” This sounds like a man who is not ready for the thing that is coming. Water of the week is a tropical flight of immunity-centered sparkling water: Acai Blueberry Immunity Support Sparkling Water from Sparkling Ice, Mango from SWAY+IMMUNITY, Pomelo CBD Sparkling Water from Lei Back.

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This is a tale of too much crime and not enough punishment. Awful. Water of the week is an Asian herbal mix: Kola Champagne from GinsengUp!, Blood Orange Ginger with Sencha Green Tea from Brew Dr. Kombucha and Guava Sparkling CBD Water from LEI BACK.

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