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In this episode, we don’t even believe in our own opinions. Water of the week is Nectarine Lemon from Polar Seltzer.

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Hey, how’s it going? Please do not message me and tell me that my voice sounds flat in the beginning of this episode. You think I don’t know that? This week we’re drinking Purely Sedona.

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This week, we’re drinking a sparkling probiotic from Ojai, CA: Blackberry & Lavender Bliss from Life Force Revel Beverages.

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In this episode of the podcast, we review sparkling Strawberry Juice from Trader Joe’s.

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Wow, I named this episode “the stupid brain” and then I didn’t even upload the right file. Whatever. I fixed it now. In this episode, we bring you two Human Interest stories. Water of the week is a blackberry ginger-flavored sparkling water called Calm + Restore from Heywell.

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Joakim had a hilarious idea and now it’s not funny anymore. How is this going to end? Water of the weak is Trip: CBD-infused, lemon basil, lightly sparkling.

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This week, we’re cracking open an ice-cold can from Spindrift.

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Like always, we dissect sobriety over a tall glass of sparkling water. This week: Blood Orange by Soleil, Lemon Ginger Sparkling Water Beverage by Trader Joe’s and a metal bottle that says KŌPŪ.

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This is a retrospective of every time my face has felt ugly. Water of the week is two zero sugar flavors of Clearly Canadian: Tropical Splash and Citrus Medley.

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I just paid that parking ticket. Finally. Water of the week is Grapefruit from Rambler.

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What is really happening here? Well, water of the week is De La Calle Tropical Ponche Tepache.

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This episode is obviously a companion piece to last week’s episode, but stop me if you’ve heard this story before. I’m not kidding. If you’ve already heard this story, please interrupt and tell me. I am so very afraid of repeating myself and that fear is triggered here, because I simply can’t remember. Did we already cover all of this? Have we been here before? This place looks familiar, but I’m not sure. Perhaps, to get over my fear, I should tell the same story every week for a year, each time finding a new way to tell it, each time telling it a little bit more boring and a little bit more amazing. Water of the week is Blackberry Lemon-flavored Functional Seltzer with adaptogens and nootropics from Hiyo.

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But where does a bad mood come from? Water of the week is Alani Nu Kimade by Kim Kardashian.

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Water of the week is three flavors of Singha: Yuzu Lemon, Red Lemon, and Lime Lemon.

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Joakim is having a very hard time and there’s nothing you can do about it. Water of the week is a bottle of Perrier from the strip club on Montecito St. Would it be rude to mention that the lady who sold me this water really needed a breath mint?

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What happens in the mind of a small animal if you take away his home? What will the honeybee do if you separate him from the hive? What happens to the spider if you clean your house and destroy his cobweb? The duck without a pond? The ant without the anthill? Anyway, this week’s water is Sparkling Berries from Origin.

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What kind of episode title is that? Does that mean anything at all? Today, we’re drinking Ginger Meyer Lemon from Aura Bora.

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This week, we drink the sparkling stuff from Tahoe Artesian Water.

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Everything is moving away from me and I don’t know what’s going on: Water of the week is Winter Sangria and Raspberry Lime from Trader Joe’s.

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This is from years ago and there is nothing we can’t be honest about.

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I don’t know what it means that we keep forgetting to drink the water, but I know it’s not a good sign. What else are we forgetting?

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Water of the week is Watermelon Lime from Olipop.

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An average human life is four thousand episodes of sparkling water, but that’s not true if we’re too distracted and forget to drink the water. In that case, it’s even shorter.

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