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150. Joakim Might Snap

Maddie is back and she is forced to guest host, because Joakim doesn’t have it anymore. Whatever it was, it’s gone now. Water of the week is an astringent flight of difficult water: WILFRED’S (rosemary and bitter orange non-alcoholic aperitif) in Cascade Mountain Butte Falls Sparkling Water, and Raspberry n’ Rhubarb from Egekilde… and what’s the third water? Rhubarb something from Sweden? I can’t remember… wait… I’m remembering something. Ok. Culture Pop. Strawberry Rhubarb from Culture Pop. Phew.

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149. The Ali Kolbert Show

In this episode, we talk about something very difficult and get to some really satisfying answers. Water of the week is Mango from Ramlösa and Mango-Lime from Loka.

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148. The Curse

This episode is sponsored by Delta Airlines: Super Speed, Super Comfort, Superstition. Water of the week is three pineapple-flavored sparkling waters: Pineapple Spice from De La Calle Tepache, Ananas from Ramlösa and Passionsfrukt & Ananas from Loka.

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147. American Darkness

For this episode, I was feeling out of sorts and forgot to drink the water. There was a bucket full of pineapple-flavored sparkling water sitting next to me and we never got there.

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146. The Frog

Water of the week is Ramlösa Funktionsvatten med extrakt av Gröna Kaffebönor och Ginseng. Yup. Thank you.

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145. The Robots of Trollevallen

This episode is strictly for life-long fans of the pod. Strictly 4 My Dolphins. If you are not a sparkling dolphin, then please keep walking. Water of the week is Vichy and Soda from Spendrups.

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144. Everybody Hates Joakim

How did we end up here? Water of the week is Ginger Manzana from De La Calle Tepache and Tropical Fruit from Ocean Bomb.

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143. The Amanda Anderson Episode

What can we say about Amanda that hasn’t already been said in all those five-star yelp reviews? Amanda is great and I love her. She manages the hotel and I manage the restaurant. It’s a party! Water of the week is Ambo Sparkling Water, Aromatic Tonic Water from Fever-Tree, and Egekilde med brus og smag av hindbær og et strejf af rabarber. Now… I know what you’re thinking… what in the heck does strejf mean? Couldn’t tell you.

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142. That Will Never Work

Water of the week is three flavors from OCEAN BOMB: Yoghurt, Apple and White Grape.

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141. Mango from the Weird Asian Store

Thanks for checking on me. Water of the week is Mango from three different viewpoints: Manga-Habanero from Agua Bonita, Mango from One Piece Ocean Bomb, and Mango from HOPWTR.

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140. Artificial Intelligence Gambling Addiction

Other good book titles include “I am sorry you feel that way” and “I give my marriage a year.” I would like to formally apologize for the tardiness of this episode: I had to ask the computer for another 1000 pictures. Water of the week is Convicted Melon from Liquid Death.

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139. I’m letting you down…

This week, I went to a show and saw Haley Heynderickx and she told the audience that she has recorded a new album. But! She’s on a very small record label so the album won’t come out for another 3 years. Somehow, that made me feel better. When it comes to “putting things out”, everyone suffers. Even Haley Hendurizckszx. Even the stars themselves. Water of the week is Hibiscus Raspberry from Good&Gather.

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138. What now?

Next week, we will be back with regular programming. Also, do I think I’m cool when I say “check this out”? Ugh. Terrible. Water of the week is “The Green Tea One” from HOPLARK. Wow.

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137. No Episode This Week

Water of the week is “berry citrus” from Daytrip. “Probiotics are foods or supplements that contain live microorganisms intended to maintain or improve the “good” bacteria (normal microflora) in the body. Prebiotics are foods (typically high-fiber foods) that act as food for human microflora.” So probiotics are microbots themselves and prebiotics are food for the microbots?

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136. Tiff’s Last Minute Orgy

This is a non-episode, but we’ll be back to regular programming before you know it. Water is Blood Orange from HOPWTR.

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135. Mr. Sidebar Humblebrag

I’m not enjoying my own energy in this episode. It’s all slightly too frenzied and unhealthy. Are we on the brink of complete collapse? Can we know about such a thing before it happens? Can you see it coming? Well, at least we’re staying hydrated: Orange-Mango-Chili-Lime from Culture Pop Soda, Elderflower Grapefruit from Aura Bora, and Peach Tea from Humm.

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134. Raw Meatball on the Floor

In this episode, we talk about the raw meatball on the floor and how everything flows from this moment. Water of the week is Lemon Elderflower from Trader Joe’s, Strawberry Vanilla from Health-ade POP, and Mint Cucumber CBD Sparkling Water from APRCH.

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133. On Gifts

I have no idea how to gracefully accept a gift. Water of the week is (1) Peach Marigold Basil from Petal, and (2) Pomelo Sage and (3) Yuzu Orange Blossom from Lolo Sparkling Hop water. Thanks for the water, Maddie.

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132. This Week in No Sparkling Water

This episode was so shameful that I forgot to review the three waters in the ice bucket: “For as long as we’ve had butt cheeks, we’ve been able to imagine what it would feel like to poop our pants.”

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131. A Well Running Dry

In the library of rare colors, they have a brown color called “mummy.” This pigment was made by grinding up Egyptian mummies and turning them into paint. Water of the week is naturally and artificially flavored strawberry Faygo Redpop!

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130. And what’s the problem now?

Water of the week is Sparkling Clam. Yup, you read that right – sparkling clam! It may sound unusual, but it’s a beverage that has been gaining popularity in some parts of the world, and Joakim is here to give us his expert opinion on it. Okay, so what now? You think this episode description was also written by ChatGPT? You think it’s Artificial Intelligence all the way down? Reaching the lower reaches of the nothingness of the nothing? You think we’ve completely lost everything already? Anyway. Let’s talk about the big question: What’s wrong the the New York Times? Let’s see what the people have to say…
“basically that it’s all about how you can’t just appreciate that something happened but rather it’s only meaningful if it’s this social media style experience narrated by the reporter”
“the other thing is about just being really wordy and vague and using a ton of words when the thing could be just very simply stated, perhaps because this wordy approach is considered colloquial and attractive but also because it helps them to deliver an angle, a sort of ironic point of view”
“and they use verbs with no clear subject”
“or passive voice in a suspicious way”

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129. Mr. Goodbubble goes to the Grand Canyon

We’re on the road again. Water is Berry Cream Probiotic Soda from Humm, Watermelon CBD Sparkling Water from Aprch, and Watermelon, Lime & Rosemary Probiotic Soda from Culture Pop Soda.

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127. Maddie Davis is back?

Why is Joakim always so condescending when he tries to explain how to make a cup of coffee? Water of the week is Mango-flavored HOPWTR and Confidence Mood-Boosting Refreshments in two flavors (Mango-Peach and Lemon-Lime).

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126. In the End, Everything Curdles

We can’t be good at everything, people. Water of the week is not water: Coca Cola with Coffee (dark blend), Coca Cola with Coffee (vanilla), Nitro Pepsi Draft Cola.