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The Penis Catalog

Dear Sweden,

Here in America, there are no penis catalogs that wives can flip through to pick out the perfect penis for their husband’s penis augmentation surgery. These catalogs don’t exist, because the Americans fear that it would make the husbands feel self-conscious and develop body image problems. Therefore, they haven’t even researched sophisticated penis augmentation technology. They don’t want people to think about the male body like that. They don’t want to suggest that the male body isn’t perfect the way it is. Here in America, husbands with small and boring penises are allowed to feel comfortable with their bodies.

But at least the next generation of Americans might be more progressive, because this issue is discussed on the children’s cartoon show Rick and Morty.